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The Crazy Thing About Grace

I moved to Germany in the last week and having lived in many cities in my life and having to have moved a lot between countries both me and my wife, the move was easy. We are simply used to having our luggages packed almost all the time. I guess this is life. From London days and Basildon nights to a new life in the suburbs of Neidersachen ( Lower Saxony, Germany), a suburb in the middle of nowhere. Praise God for Internet, Telephone, Water, Rewe (akin to ASDA UK) ,  the brand "Ja" (the equivalent of ASDA Smart Price) and my wonderful landlords. Th house is a lovely thing and once we get it arranged, then we are going to be very happy. Last week we even had our first guest. Praise God! I always wanted to welcome people to my house and till date this is the first property that has been in my name (and I am just renting this one). So, what is the point of all this? Well, it is to tell the manner that I am overwhelmed at the amount of change in my life. I carry Euro in my

Hidden-ness of God - A take on Psalms 77

Asaph cries out to God telling Him that God has been absolutely silent to him. Telling God that He has kept him awake and that Asaph's heart refuses to be comforted. He keeps asking in this song "Will the Lord spurn forever?" "Will God just forget us?" ( Psalm 77 ) This theme is common through the Bible, a God who seems hidden. But is it so ? I wondered and found that I too at many times have asked that question. Will God not show Himself ? I kept praying and I found out that it was for His glory that God did all that. Seriously!  Let me tell you an incident. I have recently applied for a visa to a country and strangely I went to the embassy of that country without the right document. It was not that I did not want to, but I did not have any. I had decided to go to the embassy and ask if the documents I had was enough and seek advice to find alternatives to the documents I lacked. Strange as it could be, the embassy who on the phone seemed strict with a

Seeing grace to feel worthy

It's really been tough to get through this week! I felt lonely, lost and weak. Yes,  I have a bunch of close friends and family and yes my fiance is lovely and caring yet I needed more than what they could offer. I feel stretched beyond all measures. I have prayed more, cried more, worked more,  even socialised more this week than any other recent weeks. Sometimes you wish that the someone would just see you and tell you that you are doing a good job. Yet, it is not quite enough just because you are exhausted. I really want a long long hug where I could break into tears and yet, yet there is a discomfort.  I need more than a person. I really need God. I want to feel that He values my work. I am that stretched. Financially I got peanuts in my bank, I have a lot of responsibilities to fulfill as I am winding down my life in London. Emotionally I am quite torn from arguments with people and the loss of friends and lifestyle I had. And to add to it,  I been learning German and I

Child sex robots.

I stared at this picture for so long. Something did not quite make sense. This was no longer artificial intelligence made in the image of man, but rather a purposeful machine made to cater some impulses. There are many blogs , I would guess that would list the good and bad aspects of such a creation. I am rather shocked. It has not been too long since we heard of Sweetie . The idea of robots as companion has always fascinated me. I had a toy robot when I was a boy, later when I learned to design bots, I had considered the conditions of artificial intelligence seriously. Back in 2008, there were some experimental robots who were fitted with female upper body and I knew then that one day sex bots would be norm, but always had faith in the robotic community that they would grow out of their boyish nature and would create better products. When Sweetie was released, I wondered how many hours of animation had been wasted on trying to perfect a human child. Bear with me here, I have f

Fear and the Lord

Sometime ago I was flying from London to Mumbai. At 39000 feet above the seas and the land mass that I have been for a short while calling 'home', the clouds came together , hiding it from my view. I knew for well that in less than the 20 days I should be  back again in my cosy room in the tiny town of Essex. I was quite teary eyed - not for long -  just few tears drop fell off my cheeks. I was not sad but there is always a longing for the people and the love of home that I find wanting me to let go of my hold on it , doing this was emotional. As the flight embarked the upward journey, the clouds that seemed like nomads showed a very life like perspective to them. There, like jellyfish, the blob of white and radiant clouds broke off at edges like tentacles and tried it's best to hold onto the pieces that were falling apart.  I must confess that all this seemed too dramatic and exciting for my normal day life and I was pleasantly amused . I was drawn to Psalms 19 wh

Building The Dung gate

Malchijah the son of Rechab, ruler of the district of Beth- haccherem, repaired the Dung Gate.  He rebuilt it and set its doors, its bolts, and its bars. (Nehemiah3:14 ESV)    In the story of Nehemiah, the third charter talks about people building walls of Jerusalem. I often skipped this portion as it seemed to be a bunch of names. But recently at my Church (Christ Church London) David Stroud spoke from this portion. Only  then had I realised that this portion I skip had a lot of interesting things to teach me. One of them is the story of how a Jewish leader named Malchijah had taken the responsible task of building the Dung wall. Now, we who live or have only lived in developed cities don't realise the blessing of the sewage system. I lived with my grandparents and few years ago in the village and mind you we did have a brilliant sewage system at our house but there was no plastic waste disposal and our backyard suffered very much. I think it was the Romans who had g

Random Thoughts

Christians are often baffled by the statements in Bible like "be not of the world" or more accurately "Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind (Romans 12:2 ESV) ". Now, I think there are many ways we can look at any sentence, but the Bible is not meant to read in the form of individual sentences or verses. The Bible is made up of letters and reading one line from any letter will give anyone the intend of the whole letter. So, to make sense of this sentence, I would have to read the whole letter, or at the least the entire passage. The passage is a build up from Romans 1 till 11, where Paul talks to the new believers that they have to live good lives that are counter to their previous life they lived before they knew the gospel. This is the pattern of life a Christian should live, and God expects Christians to do so and will support then in doing so.

മോചനം

This is my second malayalam poem and my first Christian poem. It's based on salvation by grace and ends in eternity. Special thanks to my mummy who had coauthored this and helped with rhythm , flow, grammar correction and malayalam typing. നിൻ കരുണയിൽ ഉറപ്പാകുമെൻ ജീവിതം, നിൻ കരുതലിൽ ഉറപ്പാകുമെൻ തപസ്സും, നിൻ കരുണയിൽ ഉയരുമെൻ ഹൃദയവും, നിൻ കൃപ കൃപയിൽ സ്ഥിരമാകുമെൻ മാനസം. നിൻ കൃപയാൽ ഉറപ്പാകുമെൻ ജീവിതം, നിൻ കരുണയിൽ സ്ഥിരമാകുമെൻ പാദവും, നിന്നുടെ ശിരസ്സിൽ നിന്നൊഴുകിയ ചോരയിൽ, ശുദ്ധീകരിക്കുമെൻ കൻമഷ മാനസം. നിൻ പാദത്തിൽ ഉടച്ചതാം എൻ പരിമളതൈലം , നിൻ മറുവിലയിൽ ഏറെ തുശ്ചമയ്യോ! എൻ പാപമുയരുന്ന ഗിരിയിൽ നിൻ ജഡം, ഉയർന്നൂ ഗോൽഗോഥായിൽ സൂര്യതേജസ്സിൻ മറവിൽ. വിലയേറിയതാമെൻ പാപദേഹിയെ, വിലയ്ക്കു വാങ്ങി നീ നിൻ  ദിവ്യ   ദേഹത്താൽ , കഴുകി നീ എന്നിലെ പാപക്കറകളെ, നിൻ ത്യാഗരക്തത്തിൻ ഒഴുക്കിൻ ശക്തിയാൽ. നിന്നുടെ മുൾപാടുകളാണെൻടെ മോചനം, അവയെൻ നേത്റത്തിൽനിന്നകറ്റീ  തിമിരവും, നിന്നുടെ ദേഹിതൻ അവസാന ശ്വാസവും എൻ പുതുജീവൻടെ, പുലർക്കാലഘോഷണം. നീ വീണ്ടെടുത്തോരീയടിയാൻ അണയുന്നു നിന്നിൽ, നിൻകൃപ മാത്

Sign Posts

Chennai is a remarkable place to stay.  The road traffic is lovely too. This is the place from where I begin this short series called Sign Posts. I want you to join my team of jurors in deciding the verdict on finding the reality of signs. Statement : We have lots of signs to guide us. Defense: We are led to believe there are lots of signs. Sign No1 : TREE AHEAD Copyleft. Frank Starmer May i draw your attention, members of the jury, to exhibit A. The sign in front of a tree so that you may not hit it. But seriously does this sign help? I do not think so. Lets assume you saw the tree from far, you would move out of its way.  And assume you were distracted and then you did see the tiny little sign nailed to the very tree that its warning about. Bham!! You just lost a fortune on repairs due to a careless tree not looking both ways before crossing. Seriously , members of the jury, i say if we get signs in life at such short notice we are a dead meat.

Devotion - not of dust, but of Diety

I was reading an interesting article on Desiring God blog  by Maxwell , when it occurred to me about the point that was being made in it. We often see devotion as something we have to give God. Thus we often look at devotion as what an inferior being gives to a superior one. We who are Christians from childhood are told often that we must be devoted to God and those of us from a Pentecostal or Arminian heritage are told that God values us on our devotion to Him. While it may be slightly true, the truth is this. God doesn't depend on us. Let me illustrate with a personal example. My fiance is not much of a talker. So, to understand her means I would have to listen to her unspoken words, the hmm's, the nods and the facial expressions. I am sure that I am going to miss a lot of things she has not spoken to me about and more over she may fail to express in words her love and devotion to me. I now having discovered that, though it being really hard, I  am getting better to ap

Should I obey God because He wants me to obey Him and gives me rewards?

I find obedience a by product of love.  I am engaged to marry and my fiance loves me.  Now because of this she obeys when I ask her to do something or other. God's justice is in his nature as much as his holiness, jealousy  and love. If we were to obey God only because He gives us gifts then we love the gifts and not God. In Job 2:10 it says if we are happy to get good gifts why can't we rejoice when we are hurt by God. God's desire for us to be obedient is because He wants us to find Him our only and greatest treasure. Absolute obedience comes with absolute surrender and I think it's this what we should wake up each day for. See where in our lives we have not surrendered. I find sometimes taking five minutes extra in my morning devotion a pain, but God let's me in my pace to surrender my hold onto my precious five minutes. The rewards is only going to be in heaven, and the reward is meeting Him in all holiness ; what we get here on earth is still His mercy. Even th