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Seeing grace to feel worthy




It's really been tough to get through this week! I felt lonely, lost and weak. Yes,  I have a bunch of close friends and family and yes my fiance is lovely and caring yet I needed more than what they could offer. I feel stretched beyond all measures. I have prayed more, cried more, worked more,  even socialised more this week than any other recent weeks. Sometimes you wish that the someone would just see you and tell you that you are doing a good job. Yet, it is not quite enough just because you are exhausted. I really want a long long hug where I could break into tears and yet, yet there is a discomfort.  I need more than a person. I really need God. I want to feel that He values my work. I am that stretched. Financially I got peanuts in my bank, I have a lot of responsibilities to fulfill as I am winding down my life in London. Emotionally I am quite torn from arguments with people and the loss of friends and lifestyle I had. And to add to it,  I been learning German and I am failing to impress my self. I had couple of friends recently tell me how impressed they were with me. It doesn't quite register. 
Ever felt  like that?
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